Perfection of being truly me!

By:  Grazyna Witkowska Date: 11th September 2019

Japanese people value an item with a flaw more than they value a flawless item. That object is more valuable because it is unique.

Hmm… there is a much greater truth in this point of view.

When you look at people you love and people you loved – they were unique. And yes they were unique in their appearance and they probably had some imperfections too… but what made them so truly special is how you got to feel about them. And this happened over time.

The Little Prince (from “The Little Prince” by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry) had his special Rose – the only one, unique Rose. She told The Little Prince that she was the only Rose – not only on his planet but in the entire universe. And then, when The Little Prince came to visit the Earth, he found himself walking through a great big rose garden. And every rose in this garden was smiling at him, wanted to get his attention.


The Little Prince cried because he felt his Rose lied to him. And he felt confused – his Rose was not the only one of her kind?

And then he realised that his Rose was indeed unique, different from all the other roses in the entire universe. What made the difference was the time he devoted to her.

The time we spend considering the needs of others, getting to know them and allowing them to get to know us, accepting them for who they are – builds a special bond. We do that with people and we do that – even faster – with animals.

Having such bonds gives us a sense of safety, enriches our resilience, and allows us to be freer to express ourselves in the world.

As humans, we need other people in our lives. There is evidence that people who feel that they belong live happier, healthier and longer lives! And yes, people with pets live happier and healthier and longer lives.

I’d say, it is easier to love animals than humans and feel a sense of belonging – at least it is easier for animal lovers. With humans we have a lot of baggage and it obstructs our path to closer connections. With animals we feel that they love us unconditionally and so we are able to allow ourselves to build closer bonds more quickly.

I’d say, we often underappreciate how deeply it can be possible to bond with our animals and, in consequence, short change ourselves (and the animal) to experience the rewards of that deeper bond. Because relating to an animal can be wonderful from the very start, we underestimate its potential and – in our busy lives – put limited focus on exploring, growing, and learning from this relationship.

I’d say, consciously developing our relationships with animals can be a great training ground to create wonderful relationships with other humans.

So what do you say? Are you ready to be challenged to go the next step within your human-animal relationship? Are you ready to experience how much more ‘free to be you’ you can grow from having such a bond?

Start with this:


Ask yourself how you could delight your animal. This could be an extra walk, a longer walk, a massage, sitting side by side together… The important thing is to show your animal how special they are in terms that are meaningful to them.


Be consistent in offering this extra nurturing to your animal for a month or two.


Observe your animal’s behaviour, observe your feelings, observe the dynamic between both of you, and observe your behaviour with other people.


What patterns have unfolded?


Can you use the same process to enrich your relationship with another human?


Write to me and share your observations with the community – your success will nurture, enrich and inspire others!

And before you go and start your experiment… a little secret, a secret that The Fox told The Little Prince:
“It is only with the heart that we can see rightly. What is essential is invisible to the eye”.

And you probably already know that animals are experts at opening our hearts …so we can see rightly.

Grażyna Witkowska - Kinesiology and Hypnosis

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